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Don't Turn Your Relationship Over to Just Any Therapist!
Contrary to popular understanding, a large majority of counselors are simply not qualified to treat couples and families. Many therapists in private practice today who offer Marriage, Couples, and Family Therapy do not have the training, supervision, or experience to work with more than one person in the therapy room. This is very unfortunate, because it takes very specific skills and knowledge to navigate the complex terrain of relationship issues. After all, when more than one person is present in a counseling session, they are all likely to have very conflicting and sometimes volatile opinions and ideas. If a therapist is not specifically prepared to intervene in problematic communication and systems' patterns, he or she might inadvertently appear to "take sides" or alienate one or more of the clients.
Even mediocre marriage and family therapy can do far more harm than good. This can result in mediocre outcomes at best, and at worst, could lead to what we at Marriage and Family Therapy Services consider the tragedy of an "unnecessary divorce." Just as the skills of a general medical practitioner and a cancer specialist differ significantly, the competencies of an "individually-trained" therapist and a "couples/marital therapist" are vastly different.
Click here to read a powerful account of a "Marital Reconciliation Miracle," a story of what's possible when a competent therapist take a "pro-marriage" stand for a troubled couple's future. This article suggests that the therapist's stance and competency has a crucial role in allowing couples to fully explore the potential for marital reconciliation.
Marriage and Family Therapy Services is a member of the
National Registry of Marriage-Friendly Therapists.
Click here to link to the National Registry of Marriage Friendly Therapists Website. This highly regarded Registry is an advanced practitioner network of highly skilled marriage and couples therapists. The Registry requires members to possess rigorous training, experience, and supervision in the area of marital/couples counseling. Registry members also agree to the Registry's "Pro-Marriage" Values Statement, which commits to preserving marriage and avoiding divorce whenever possible.
We believe most couples would be surprised at how many therapists are not willing to state this about their counseling practice! In many cases, we think the reason is that they are not specifically trained, and therefore, not competent to make such a claim. In fact, according to the Registry, the majority of professionals providing marriage/couples therapy today claim to be "neutral" about whether or not marriages should be reconciled, and some even recommend divorce! Certainly, we know that not all marriages can be saved. But when the one "expert" a troubled-couple hires to explore this possibility does not believe strongly in (nor have appropriate competence in) this, how can the couple even have a chance at marital reconciliation?
Click here to read the National Registry of Marriage Friendly Therapist's Values Statement.
Click here to link to the Registry's page which describes why many counselors are not competent to practice couples therapy, and why couples are essentially "playing Russian Roulette" with their relationship when they attempt to enlist the help of an unqualified practitioner.
Marriage and Family Therapists Really Are the Relationship Specialists.
The Marriage and Family Therapists at MFTS have spent their entire graduate and post-graduate careers studying and working with couples and family systems. We have perfected an approach to couples and families that really works. This process allows all participants to experience being listened to -- this helps them know their perspective is being honored and respected. We develop treatment plans which not only resolve and heal the communication breakdowns and hurts from the past, but empower the once-polarized members of a couple or family to come together in a new and creative ways.
Our clients tell us our approach really works! (click here to read their stories)
We are confident that the specialty of Marriage and Family Therapy is the single best way to treat a problem within a relationship, couple or a family system. Doesn't your relationship deserve an expert?
Choosing Your Therapist:
When seeking help for personal or family problems, it is very important to choose a therapist wisely. After all, you will be entrusting this person with very sensitive and private information. The decision should always be made carefully, with purpose and forethought.
Crucial Factor: A “good fit.” The following are additional considerations to make before choosing a potential therapist:
Research has shown that the most important factor in successful therapy is the counselor/client relationship. For this reason, it is important to be sure there is a good fit between you and your counselor. It is recommended that you do not necessarily settle on the first therapist you find, or just pick someone who is a provider on your insurance panel! As one of our clients told us, "Therapy is just not one of those things you should be bargain-hunting for."
It is smart to “shop around” until you find someone with whom you feel a good connection – someone who has the combination of knowledge, experience, and emotional supportiveness that you are comfortable with. And, of course, we believe you should choose a Marriage and Family Therapist.
Other Factors:
Training/Education One More Suggestion:
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists, Licensed Professional Counselors, and Licensed Clinical Social Workers all require either a Master’s Degree or Doctorate, with specifically supervised training for their clinical specialties. Associate therapists have graduated from an accredited counseling program, and are working towards receiving licensure. Associates must earn a certain number of supervised clinical hours and pass the state licensure exam in their particular specialty area in order to become fully licensed. This process generally takes 1-2 years, post-graduate. Student therapists (practicum students and interns) are working towards a Master’s Degree or Doctorate and have the requisite educational training to consult with clients when they are enrolled in an accredited graduate school program. They are working under the supervision of other licensed therapists and state approved supervisors.
Licensure/Certification
While a license/certification is certainly no guarantee of quality or skill level, it is helpful to know that a therapist has fulfilled the state’s requirements for training and education, or is in the process of working towards licensure. When a therapist is licensed by a state board, s/he is held to the highest standard of ethical and legal professionalism in the counseling profession.
Ask Questions!
Remember that in the therapist/client relationship, you are the customer! You have the right to have all of your questions answered about therapy and the qualifications of a particular therapist. One important question clients might consider asking potential therapists is whether or not they have been in therapy themselves, and what have they learned and gained from it.
We believe that in order for counselors to provide the highest level of service to their clients, they themselves must be living healthy and empowered lives. This allows clients to have a role-model for healthy living! If your potential therapist does not have any experience as a client, s/he may not be able to identify with being on the "client side of the couch," and may not truly understand what it takes to lead people "where they themselves have not actually walked." We believe that good therapists are able to "do what they teach," which provides a foundation of integrity. This foundation can become the basis for powerful and permanent change in people's lives.
Interview potential therapists before you make a decision about contracting with them for services, and be sure you feel optimistic about working with them. You are not under any obligation to continue working with a therapist whose skills and expertise do not engender in you total confidence. And while it is best to terminate a counseling relationship in consult with the current therapist, clients can leave therapy at any time, for any reason -- especially if they do not believe their therapist is equipped to handle the complexities of relationship issues.
For Free Audio Podcast Recordings related to Creating a Thriving Life,
with subjects including:
* Couples On The Brink of Divorce*
*A New Paradigm of Relationships*
*Using the 12-Steps to Solve Relationship Problems*
*Learning Assertiveness*
*Forgiving Yourself*
and more...
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http://www.powertothriveradio.com/
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